So, going back to my post before about why I went missing. I have been busy. And if you feel like back-tracking or you remember everything I’ve ever written because you’re cool (or obsessive) like that, Hypothesis #4 or the last Hypothesis was correct. Most of them were correct. You can probably figure out which ones on your own.
I got myself a boy. He’ll be known from now on as The Boy. Of course, this is a different person from Boy, who is Best Friend’s male companion. Figured that needed to be clarified.
First, the story of what occurred over Christmas Break. I typed this up for a friend while part of it was occurring, and freaked out. Names have been changed, of course, mostly because the character’s have their blog names and I want to avoid confusion by using their real names and… Moving on.
Okay, so last night, as you know, there was the zipper conversation*. He has his group of guy friends that I started calling the Maghreb Pack (Maghreb is Algeria, Morocco, and Tunisia, the French speaking African countries.)
Me- Question: When I get exciting messages from the Pack do you offer them your phone or do they say they want to talk to me because I’m wise like Yoda?
The Boy: They want to talk to you cause you’re wise…like Yoda.
M: Which in Pack Language means I’m a female human who doesn’t think they’re the weirdest freaks that ever existed.
TB: Well (Name) desperately wanted to talk cause I told him you were hot.
Me: Are you awake?
Best Friend: Yeah I am why?
M: How do I respond to this:
Well (Name) desperately wanted to talk cause I told him you were hot.
BF: WHOA BABY!!!!!!!!
BF: Oh my god!!!!! Well you are hot so, it’s a compliment girl!!! Want me to…talk to The Boy?
M: ….thank you?
I don’t know. I don’t know if he was being serious! Damn you texts.
BF: You’re pretty surround sound**! So want me to talk to him?
M: I ended up asking what texts came from that person. Because I had no idea how to address the 2nd part.
BF: I should talk to him, je pense.
If you do, be insanely subtle. You never saw that forwarded text.
M: My eyes seriously bulged at that.
BF: I can imagine! Did you get any other weird texts from him?
M: Um… Probably the most important other one was when I told him about a toddler at Old Navy ogling me.
BF: What was his response?
M: Hehe, a toddler thought you were hot. What kids learn from there chips these days.
And then I said:
I should get a shirt that says that. “Toddlers think I’m hot.”
And he said: I’ll get the same shirt cause I’m weird like that.
Back to Main Conversation
M: Was this the mountain lion or train person? Or were those texts from the same person?
TB:They were all shouting out things to write. It was odd.
M: Good to know. I’m popular with the Pack.
TB: You most certainly are.
Now the rest will be in Side Convo
M: Apparently I’m popular with the Pack.
BF: So he talks about you… I think he likes ya!
M: They like to steal his phone and text me. Generally about animal reproductive parts/boobs/ animal sex.
Give me an example of a txt they send.
M: This is The Boy’s friend, Buddy. I am worried that The Boy is having an affair with a kangaroo; a male kangaroo.
A Maghreb Pakian is currently doing a mountain lion. The noise is disturbing.
M: Did I tell you about the Youth in Revolt suggestion?
BF: No you did not. The Boy gave me a few weird clues about the person he likes…
M: What were the clues?
We were simultaneously watching Michael Cera AKA El Cerito movies (Paper Heart & Year One) and I said I want to see YiR. [Which got no response.]
Group fandango a la Paris?
BF: 4, village, cheesecake and hidden fork, you cant fly in the thirde trimester, before deep powder, and the chick took a dookie.
BF:I was like… WHAT THE FRICK IM NOT A GENIUS
M: Yeah, those pretty much all mean nothing to me.
BF: Girlllll I raked up some info. Wanna know?***
M: Yay a ya
BF: He does think youre hot! Thennn I asked him if he would go out with you. And he said why not, lets have some fun with it. I would date her.
M: Are. You. Serious.
BF: Yes, 100% girl.
M: ARE YOU SURE YOU CANT MEET FOR A TWO SECOND GANG BANG????????****
FAST FORWARD TO LIKE RIGHT NOW
M: Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
“So, I have a short story for you that will culminate in me asking you out. Mk? Mk.”
*This is in reference to when I taught him that girl’s jeans have zippers on them.
** My nickname in the group is Surround Sound. When prompted to come up with a nickname for me, The Boy was at an electronics store.
*** Yes, we talk like white gangsters.
**** As in meet up for a friend conference.
His story involved Harry Potter. The Boy gets me. We speak our own language of nerdy awesomeness. I’ll post the story at some point.
And… I’m happy. He was my best guy friend before this, and I thought I liked him on and off. Over the break I really started to understand how awesome he was, and how similar we are and started to miss getting to see him every day.
If you look through my tags, you’ll be able to find my past stories involving The Boy, and his previous blog identity.