Valentine’s Day 2011

So, I suppose it’s time that I finally address this. Andrea will undoubtedly freak out over this post, read too much into it, and harass me on Facebook in 50 messages all in upper case letters.

There were no tomato plants involved in this year’s V Day. There were also no males.

BBF and I split on Friday. It was mutual, and we’re just friends now. There were no tears, fights, or screaming. He showed up at my house, gave me a wand for Christmas (Yeah, it was the first time I’ve seen him since December), we talked on the porch, and then he left.

Really, I’m grateful it happened this way. He saved me from having to break up with him. It just wasn’t going to work out. This summer was great, but he has his life now and I have mine. I’m leaving next year for who knows where. We see each other for a day every other month or so now. I like spending time with him, and I’m always happy that day, but afterwards I don’t feel like I need to see him. I’m perfectly fine on my own. There was no way we were going to do long distance next year. Our relationship was already long distance enough, and the actual thing is not something I’m interested in.

I’m really looking forward to college boys.


Refresher Course

I know I’ve gotten some new readers lately through NaNo, NaBlo, etc. Rather than make you dig around trying to figure things out, here’s a quick list of acronyms and secret agent code names you might encounter.

Best Friend

This one should be obvious. If you can’t figure this out, I’m not sure how you’re capable of using the internet. Best Friend is my best friend. Simple, right?

The Boy

Now an ex-boyfriend, he earned the title because he was the first male discussed on this blog. January-June.


Better BoyFriend. So named because he is not socially inept like someone else (see above). Current gentleman caller. June-Present Day. *cough*wassinglefortendays*cough*


Another person so dubbed because of their earlier involvement. An ex-boyfriend of Best Friend. November 2009-February?


Boy’s successor, and also now an ex of Best Friend. He looks like an elf. Seriously. Only now he thinks he’s Jesus. But he was an elf first. May-September/October?


National Novel Writing Month. I write 50,000 words each November, because I’m crazy. I’m shooting for 100,000 this year.


National Blog Posting Month. Also in November, making me even crazier. Yes, that means I write 50,000 words of a novel, and 30 blog posts in a month. Hurts so good.


I <3 Shazam

For those of you poor people not in the know, Shazam is an amazing app for the iPhone that you can use to identify music. At a store and you hear a song you love but don’t know? Shazam it! Now, I’m cheap and only use the free version of Shazam so I can only get 5 songs identified a month. Most of the time I’m unable to easily Shazam a song, or I forget about it and just google the lyrics by typing in a line or two.

Today I set up a queue of some of the songs I’ve Shazamed lately on YouTube and listened to them while I had NaNo time. I’ll probably break this up into two posts since I want to actually write about the songs a little too.

All In- Lifehouse

I feel like I’ve heard this song around before. I don’t know what to say about it now… Okay, so there are songs I actually have things to say about, I promise. Just not this one.

Lisztomania- Phoenix

This song has been on the radio all the time lately. I tagged it a while ago and forgot about it until I was setting up a playlist on iTunes and was just putting all my Shazam songs on it. I was really excited when this one started to play and I realized that I knew this song. I always stop to listen to it when it’s on the radio, or at least most of the time, so I was happy to finally know what it’s called.

Help I’m Alive- Metric

I’ve started really liking Metric since I first found them after seeing Scott Pilgrim. Remember that song that Scott’s ex-girlfriend and her band sang? That was a Metric song. I really like Help I’m Alive. I heard it on the radio one morning and wanted to know what it was called since I liked it, and was happily surprised when I found out it was by Metric. I have the acoustic version on my phone, which I prefer. I also converted BBF so he likes this song too.

Take Everything- Greg Laswell

I really like this song. I need to listen to more of his music because I really like this song. Greg Laswell kind of reminds me of Mat Kearney. Specifically, Closer to Love, another song I heard on the radio and looked up because I loved it. My Shazam mix is really interesting because it’s pretty diverse, and I don’t think I would normally listen to a few of these songs otherwise.

Civil Twilight- Letters from the Sky

Another song I feel like I’ve heard around before. Supposedly it was on Harper’s Island, although I never watched that. Sounds kind of like Coldplay or U2 to me.


More to come tomorrow…

In Five Years: 2010

What do you want your life to be like in five years?

I’ve decided to answer this question at least once a year. Maybe this blog will even make it to 2015, and I’ll be able to compare the end result to all my previous ideas. Expect this to be a long post.

Five years from today I will be 22 years old. I will hopefully be out of college. And wow, five years seems so far away. I’ll try and outline those five years, and what I want to come from them, so I’ll have more to compare to in the future.


This is the year I’ve been waiting for. The year when I graduate from high school, and begin college. The last year that seems to make sense. I mean… 2015? That just looks awkward, you know? 2011 is going to be amazing. I’ll have so much going on. Now, I’m a dreamer. I spend so much time playing out situations in my head, and then playing them out again and again. This blog post is probably going to suffer because of that. Talking about how I imagine the next 5 years? There’s a novel right there.

In June I’ll graduate from high school. The ticker is on the sidebar. The summer before college? If I can I’ll probably get a job so I can save up for extra items and books for the next year. I don’t think my college savings account will cover shoes. I’d like to go on a road trip with my friends before we all go our separate ways. We’ve talked about going to Florida to go to the new Harry Potter theme park, but we’re split between those who would be willing to drive for the fun and the experience, and those who want to fly. And by those I mean Best Friend. I also think it would be fun to go on a road trip to all the campuses we would be at in the fall so we could see each others’ schools and picture them there.

In fall I’ll be starting college. Hopefully at UCI or UW. Fingers crossed, knock on wood, get out the lucky coin. If I go to UW I’m actually considering joining a sorority. Now, I’m not a very girly, ra-ra kind of girl, but I’m thinking that if I end up moving to a new city in a new state for college, I’m going to need friends and a support system, and fast. I like the whole family idea of a sorority. Plus, I know a few people who also totally would not strike anyone as sorority girls who are members and very happy.

I would totally love to become best friends with my roommate. To be able to come home and gossip about our days and eat ice cream in our PJs together. As an only child, I look for siblings wherever I can get them.

My new blog will have launched in the summer, and I’ll still be writing away. I’ll also be writing reviews and such for shoe money.

Dating wise? I’m not going to talk about those relationships in detail. That’s the one thing I don’t feel like I can make hypothetical situations about, and don’t want to. I don’t know where BBF and I will be in a year, and I don’t want to make any plans. I want to just go with the flow when it comes to us. Whatever happens, happens. I’ve learned in the last year that it’s best to just see where life takes you in that area.


In 2012 I’ll be a sophomore in college. Depending on what school I end up in, I’ll be living in a dorm/apartment/sorority house. If I stay in California and end up in a public I’ll probably be in a dorm for another year. Out of state of private I’m thinking apartment. Apartment with at least one roommate, who may have been my roommate the year before, or is one of my super cool new college friends I met in class or something. If it’s an apartment, we will have a totally cool place, with stuff in it from like Urban Outfitters or Mod Cloth. And lots of IKEA things. It’ll be quirky cute.

I’ll probably be working this year, and maybe the year before. Hopefully something related to what I’m studying, but I can also see myself working apparel at that point. If I go to UCI I’d love to have a job in the industry while I’m at college, even if I’m a gopher at NBC or something. I’ll still be participating in NaNoWriMo. 2012 will be my 4th year participating, and perhaps by this point I’ll be serving as a Municipal Liaison, meaning I’m the head honcho for the region. Probably not if I’m in Seattle since they’re pretty hardcore about NaNo.

Also, if I’m going to school in Southern California, I think in the summer I’d stay down there and work at Disneyland. Maybe not the summer before sophomore year, but at least one summer. Preferably not outside the Haunted Mansion or I will melt.


By now I’ll be 20. Junior year of college. Either 2012 or 2013 I want to study abroad. I’m really thinking Scotland or New Zealand, but I also think it would be interesting to go to some country most people probably don’t pick, like Finland. As a history major, it would be interesting to me at least, since you don’t normally learn much about the Nordic countries. And I like the cold. Although the accents are not nearly as cool as Scottish or… New Zealandish, and they also don’t speak English, which may be a problem.

Still participating in NaNo. I’d like to be working with kids somehow. If I’m in SoCal, there are lots of SAT tutor jobs (according to Craigslist).

This is getting harder the further I go. Alright…. What else?

I will hopefully still be blogging away, with blog friends to follow and what not.


My final year of college! How exciting and terrifying! 2014 seems so unbelievably far away. This would be my 6th year participating in NaNoWriMo. 6!?! My blog will also be turning six in 2014. Dear lord.

I’m really hoping I’ll be able to graduate in four years.


My first year out of college. One thing I know, by this point in time I want to have a dog. There’s no way I could separate my current dogs from each other, or from my mom. So that means a dog of my own.

Right now I’m thinking of being a history teacher so I may be getting my teaching credentials this year. Probably from one of those masters/credentials 14 month programs, which will undoubtedly kick my ass.

Either that or I’d take a gap year. Work, maybe travel. Take some time off from my future. If I did this, I’d be writing, writing, writing. For sure.

Bloggie Turns 1

Today is the 1 year anniversary/birthday of my blog. I’m trying to write some sort of deep, meaningful reflective post so bear with me.

I can certainly say that a lot has occurred since that mandatory introduction post I made on this day in 2009, back at Blogger. I took part in my first NaNoWriMo and NaBloPoMo. I won the first, and failed at the second. This year I’m coming back to the same spot, and attempting both challenges again. I feel like I’ve gotten a lot better at blogging regularly in the past couple months so hopefully I’ll win both this year. My plot for NaNo has more direction than last year, I think, when I pretty much pantsed my novel. I wrote what came to me, and generally my plot development had only been premeditated for a day or so max. This year I’ve had my idea brewing for a couple months. I’m a little hazy on my exact plot, but I really know my characters, and the world they live in. Furthermore, I know their emotions better because this year’s novel is based upon real life events. Only, you know, twisted to make them seem way cooler.

A year ago I was free of guy drama. Best Friend hadn’t even started dating Boy yet, and no one even knew that Elf existed.

It’s amazing how quickly relationships can change in such a seemingly short amount of time. A year ago TB and I were well on our way to becoming close friends, while I barely knew BBF. Now? TB and I have only had two short conversations in about 4 and a half months, while BBF and I are the ones that talk daily.

Next year?

I’ll have so much more to report on. New relationships, a new living situation…

Retrospective blog fail. I give up. I can’t be a Hallmark card for any longer.

Happy birthday, Blog. I would have made you a cake but you can’t eat. How about some cookies?

*awkward nerd humor*


The Gap But Not the Store

I can’t help but notice that TB has so many more blog posts about him than BBF, and I can’t help but feel bad about that. I attribute this to TB being my first relationship (let’s call it that) and thus I felt the need to girlishly squeal about it more. That and I saw him on a more regular basis.

I don’t feel the need to document every move of my relationship with BBF, but it’s still going. The homecoming dance was two weekends ago and he took me.

Which brings me to this plea to DJs. Please play slow songs at the beginning of the night. As nice as your boyfriend is, it’s hard to not notice when he’s damp as a tramp from being in a room full of dry humping couples that’s starting to smell like feet.

So, here’s one more post to tag him in. I don’t like the gap.

Crazy Bitch Gets a Blog

My delusional, perverted friend Andrea has recently created a blog. And when I say recently I mean yesterday. And when I say created a blog I mean I harassed her to make one until she obeyed me.

As a thank you to her, I am advertising her baby blog on here. She will undoubtedly talk about disturbing things like menstrual cups. When I foolishly let her meet BBF on webcam she asked him if he was a virgin and what the average size penis is. Clearly he is a keeper since he didn’t run away screaming.

Anyways, Andrea provides much entertainment. So go check out her blog before she calls you a cunt muscle.

(Did I mention she has a wonderful vocabulary?)


Meet BBF

BBF is way different from The Boy to the point that when we’re together I wonder what the hell I was doing with the last one (as TB is now referred to. Haha. TB. Like tuberculosis… Okay, internal monologue over.). Let’s start with some really basic differences. BBF is taller than me. Noticeably taller, not like the last one who was about the same height as me. He’s older than me by 14 months, rather than 3 months younger. He knows things about me. I’ve realized since the breakup that I knew so much useless crap about TB, and all of his likes and quirks, but I really don’t think he knew anything about me. I know BBF listens to me because he’s capable of bringing up stories I told him before.

Anyways, so BBF was the one I talked to after the breakup. At the time he was in some bizarre long-distance relationship that was also falling apart. After that chat session I was really starting to wonder if he had feelings for me. Moving fast, I know, after my 5 month long relationship just died. But really… TB and I were kind of over in March. That was the last time we did anything coupley. We weren’t worth mourning over.

This part of the story is where best friends really are the best people ever. As I believe I’ve mentioned, Best Friend and Boy broke up. She has since moved on to Elf. Elf is friends with BBF, which is one of the reasons why he got approval from me and our other friends. BBF is the nicest person ever, and I knew he couldn’t be friends with some jerk who would unexplainably break up with Best Friend like the last guy did. Anyways, this is where Best Friend and Elf became really useful. I told her all about my feelings and thoughts.

Over the next 10 days or so… (I’m shameless, I know, I know. But I’m happy. So deal with it.) BBF and long distance chick officially ended whatever was going on there, I went on Facebook and made my breakup official, and Best Friend did some excellent espionage work. Through Elf, we asked if BBF had feelings for anyone.

And he said yours truly.

We had already been planning to hang out the 4 of us, but this changed the whole plan. I knew now that it was safe to act upon the way I was feeling. I liked him and he liked me. But he didn’t know that I felt the same way, so I needed to take action. Which scared the crap out of me.

Which is why at the end of that night I let him walk away from my car without saying anything.

And then started hitting my steering wheel.

And this is another example of why I love my best friend.

She was going to drive back home with Elf and BBF. The two of them saw from the way BBF was walking back that nothing had happened. So when I started driving away, and passed Best Friend, she signaled me down. I pulled over to park again, and in the meantime she and Elf ran away leaving me and BBF alone.

My summer was great, how was yours?

The Tale of Two Boys

As promised, here’s the tale of two boys. This tale is completely different from the one I would have had to tell 2 months ago. This is me, after everything, reflecting on what’s happened. This is the enlightened and worldly me.

Let’s go back to June. My relationship with The Boy was certainly not what I’d expected, or really wanted. The physical contact between the two of us was…nonexistent. That’s not exaggerating. I wanted that to change, but I also didn’t. I wanted to feel normal, and like I was in a normal relationship, but at the same time I didn’t want that kind of stuff from him. There was an underlying feeling of repulsion. That probably should have been a pretty good sign that something wasn’t right, but The Boy was my first and I didn’t know any better. I had low standards.

During this time, I was getting closer and closer to BBF, and was starting to realize how much I enjoyed being with him. I had way more physical contact with him during the last couple months of school, and I liked it. Now, I didn’t cheat. But I used BBF as a footrest, elbow rest, chin rest, pillow a lot. And yeah, the thought that I could be happier with him popped into my head more than a few times. I wanted to give The Boy the benefit of the doubt though. Summer was coming up and I thought that would change things between us. That we’d spend more time together and actually have more of a relationship. Most importantly, I still thought that I would actually want that.

Then summer came. The Boy and I did not spend more time together. Now I didn’t even see him every day at school so we had absolutely no face to face interaction. Before we would have perpetual text conversations, but even those started to disappear.

Maybe… 2 weeks or so into the summer I was hanging out with one of my friends and was complaining about how neglected I was feeling. She wanted to be helpful and started texting date ideas to The Boy.

The next day when I got the text (yes, he did it over text. He’s a coward, what can I say?) saying that he felt too preoccupied and didn’t think we should continue to be in a relationship I was more mad and shocked than upset. Shocked that he was the one to do it, not me. Mad that he broke up with me before I got the chance to break up with him. Another sign that there was trouble in “paradise”. For months I had been dealing with the occasional thought that I really wasn’t getting much out of the relationship, and that I should just end it. Again and again, I had given him the benefit of the doubt and wanted to see things through.

And after getting the text, one of the first things I did was tell BBF. I ranted to him, and he cheered me up. As he said, The Boy clearly wasn’t right for me because he didn’t like Iron Man. By the end of the conversation on Facebook, I’d all but forgotten about The Boy. Okay, not really, but I was thoroughly distracted. And I was closer to happy than I had been in a while.

What Have You Done Part 2

Other than my relationship with BBF, not much has gone on since I last blogged. I had a birthday, went down to Southern California, checked out a couple more colleges.

Now, normally my summers are roasting hot. It’s part of living in California. However, this summer was actually relatively cool. I was able to fall asleep without the fan on every night, and only went swimming maybe 4 times the entire summer instead of nearly every day. The weather was actually really nice and barable.

And then school started. Days 2-4 I came home from school to 102 degree weather. Since then the only time it dips down into the 70’s is probably before 8 in the morning. I’m roasting right now.

Next Topic: Analysis of end of relationship #1, and thoughts looking back on it.

Then you get to learn all about BBF!